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How do you feel about hugging a woman on the first date?

Question:

How do you feel about hugging a woman on the first date? Is it better and safer than trying to kiss her? Also, is it okay to initiate?

Answer:

Hugging a woman at the end of your first and second dates is a good choice because of the neutrality of hugging.

Hugging a woman at the end of your first and second dates is a good choice because of the neutrality of hugging. By that I mean you can hug several different ways. It can be a friendship hug or it can have sexual overtones. You both decide which it is and you both decide how long the hug lasts.

When you hug her, if she wants a hug, she’ll hang on to you. If she doesn’t, it will be a quick, "thanks" hug, more of an obligation, rather than something she wants. Either way, it will give you valuable feedback as to how she feels about you and whether or not you should pursue going out with her again.

As your date comes to a close, she knows it’s ending. She’s thinking about how to end it, just as you are.

When you’re in your car, as you pull up to her place toward the end of the date, if she starts getting uncomfortable and starts to fidget, she’s just going to want to say a quick goodbye. If she’s had a wonderful time and doesn’t want it to end, that will show, too.

When you get to her place, I suggest you stop the car and ask her warmly, "Would you like me to walk you to the door?" And let her decide.

If she says yes, walk her to the door, smile and ask her if you can give her a hug goodbye. If she wants to kiss you, that’s the perfect time for her to do it without feeling pressured.

If she says some version of no (you can’t walk her to her door), just look at her warmly and say, "May I open the car door for you?" Then let her decide.

If she says yes, get out of the car and open the door for her. As she gets out of the car, say something like, "Thank you for getting together with me today. I really enjoyed it." As you say this, give her a nonsexual hug.

If she says some version of no (you can’t open the car door, i.e. "That’s okay, I can get it myself."), look at her warmly and say, "Thank you for spending some time with me today. I really enjoyed it." As you say this, lean over and give her a nonsexual hug.

Again, if she’s had a good time, it will show. If she’s interested in you romantically, that will show, too, because she’s going to want to have some kind of physical contact with you, either a hug or a kiss.

The reason this approach works so well is because there’s no pressure involved, for you or her. You’re two people who are (hopefully) becoming friends who have had a nice time and are parting favorably.

If she hasn’t had a good time, that will show, too, and she won’t want you to touch her. Why set yourself up to be rejected at the end of the date if she’s had a bad time? Why ask for a hug or a kiss just to be told no?

So, is a hug a good way to end the first few dates? Yes. It allows her to decide how much of a hug to give you. And it allows her to decide whether or not to kiss you.

Is it okay to kiss her as you hug her? On the cheek, yes. Not the lips, unless she turns to kiss you on the lips. Basically, by letting her decide, she has to respect the fact you’re being a gentleman.

Is it okay to initiate the hug? Absolutely.

Good luck and God Bless.

Note: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and not necessarily those of CyberDating.net, it's staff or management. This free advice is for entertainment purposes only.